Grandma Lily's Wit & Wisdom
Page 2


Where there is no wood, the fire goes out; and where there is no talebearer, strife ceases. Prov 26.20 92) "Gossiper" -- a person who separates the wheat from the chaff, then spreads the chaff.
91) Gossipers tell everybody not to tell anybody.
89) The English country gentleman galloping after a fox -- the unspeakable in full pursuit of the uneatable
Oscar Wild
  90) France is the only country where the money falls apart and you can't tear the toilet paper.
Billy Wilder
The tongue of the wise uses knowledge rightly, but the mouth of fools pours forth foolishness.
Prov 15.2
88) Discussion is an exchange of knowledge. Argument is an exchange of ignorance.
Robert Quillen
86) His huff arrived and he departed in it.
Alexander Woolcott
  87) No matter what happens, there is always someone who knew it would.
Be hospitable to one another without grumbling.
1 Pet 4.9
85) Social tact is making your visitors feel at home, even though you wish they were.
83) Nothing will ever be attempted if all possible objections must be first overcome.
Samuel Johnson
  84) Is it progress if a cannibal uses a fork?
Stanislaw J. Lec
Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all members of one body. Eph 4.25 82) It is rarely possible to carry the torch of truth through a crowd without singeing somebody's beard.
Joshua Bruyn
If you are reproached for the name of Christ, blessed are you, for the Spirit of glory and of God rests upon you. On their part He is blasphemed, but on your part He is glorified. 1 Pet 4.14 81) The breakfast of champions is not cereal, it's the opposition.
Nick Seitz
79) If you don't go to other people's funerals, they won't go to yours.   80) The old neighborhood has changed. Hurley Brothers Funeral Home is now called Death 'n' Things.
Elmore Leonard
There is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way of death. Prov 14.12 78) A clear conscience is merely the sign of a bad memory.
76) If at first you don't succeed, you're about average.   77) Praise does wonders for one's sense of hearing.
Everywhere and in all things I have learned both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound (have plenty) and to suffer need. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Philippians 4.12b-13 75) I wept because I had no shoes; and then I met a man who had no feet.
The borrower is servant to the lender. Prov 22.7b   74) To get back on your feet, miss two car payments.
72) I tremble for my country when I reflect that God is just.
Thomas Jefferson
  73) Blessed are the young, for they shall inherit the national debt.
Herbert Hoover
In the multitude of words sin is not lacking, but he who restrains his lips is wise. Prov 10.19   71) A closed mouth gathers no feet.
69) One symptom of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is terribly important.
Bertrand Russell
  70) Avarice is the sphincter of the heart.
Matthew Green
And whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord and not unto men Col 3.23   68) I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.
Bill Cosby
If you have 1,000 friends, you've not a friend to spare.
But if you have one enemy, you meet him everywhere.
  67) We all have the strength to endure the misfortunes of others.
La Rochefoucauld
65) Fear is that little darkroom where negatives are developed. Michael Pritchard   The fear of man brings a snare, but whoever trusts in the LORD shall be safe. Prov 29.25
63) The right to be heard does not include the right to be taken seriously. Hubert Humphrey   64) I'm for a stronger death penalty.
President George Bush (sr.)
62) Honest criticism is hard to take, particularly from a relative, a friend, an acquaintance, or a stranger.
Franklin P. Adams
  The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but he who heeds counsel is wise.
Prov 12.15
60) A woman who strives to be like a man lacks ambition.   61) Whatever women do, they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Fortunately, this is not difficult.
Charlotte Whitton
59) In Italy for 30 years under the Borgias, they had warfare, terror, murder, bloodshed. They produced Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci, and the Renaissance. In Switzerland they had brotherly love, 500 years of democracy and peace, and what did they produce? The cuckoo clock!
Orson Welles in "The Third Man," 1949
  Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. And perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
James 1.2-4
57) Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent.
Eleanor Roosevelt
  58) In spite of the cost of living, it's still popular.
Kathleen Norris
56) You can be sincere and still be stupid.   There is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way of death.
Prov 14.12
54) Never let a computer know you're in a hurry.   55) The computer is down. I hope it's something serious.
Stanton Delaplane
53) Wise men talk because they have something to say. Fools talk because they have to say something.
  Even a fool is counted wise when he holds his peace. When he shuts his lips, he is considered perceptive.
Prov 17.28
51) A closed mouth gathers no feet.   52) Tell your boss what you truly think of him, and the truth shall set you free.
50) The most difficult part of having success is finding someone who is happy for you.   Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep.
Rom 12.15
48) When you are in trouble, many people who call to sympathize are merely looking for particulars.   49) When someone tells you, "I'll think it over and let you know" -- you know.
Olin Miller
47) If you think that education is expensive, try ignorance.
Derek Bok
  He who gets wisdom loves his own soul
Prov 19.8a
45) No matter what kind of diet you are on, you can usually eat as much as you want of anything you don't like.
Walter Slezak
  46) He that looketh on a plate of ham and eggs to lust after it, hath already committed breakfast with it in his heart.
C.S. Lewis
44) If you have a job that urgently needs doing, give it to a busy man.   As vinegar to the teeth and smoke to the eyes, so is the lazy man to those who send him.
Prov 10.26
43) If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything.
Mark Twain
  The truthful lip shall be established forever, but a lying tongue is but for a moment.
Prov 12.19
41) We must believe in luck. For how else can we explain the success of those we don't like?
Jean Cocteau
  42) Illegal aliens have always been a problem in America. Ask any Indian.
Robert Orben
39) Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.
Will Rogers
  40) Easy street is a blind alley.
37) "It is good for nothing," cries the buyer; but when he has gone his way, then he boasts. Prov 20.14   38) If Noah had been truly wise
He would have swatted those two flies.
H. Castle
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